Let me ask you…how many times do you hear yourself say “OMG, I sound like my Mum or Dad?”…I know I have! If you intend to break free from using the “unfavourable” language your parents used, the first step is to increase your ‘awareness’ when you are speaking.
You see, the language that you grew up listening to is the language you will be using most of the time, because that was the language you knew and that your parents were using and modeling their behavior to you. This also means the language your children grow up listening to will be the language they will most probably use when they grow up.
It is crucial that you are aware of what “language” you are projecting to your children. Most of the time, we are not aware of HOW we speak, we just speak or express ourselves… Until you start to take note and be aware of the language you are using, which includes tone and energy, only then you will realise what you are saying and what the tone and energy behind the words actually represents.
We often speak of what we most think of? True or False?
Really think about it and tell yourself whether it is true?
How you speak is an indication of your beliefs, both limiting and empowering.
For example, if a person keeps complaining and very often expresses how depressing his or her situation is, what does that tell you? This person is most likely focusing on thoughts that are keeping him or her in a state of acting out his or her thoughts and beliefs, which leads to a limited and depressive situation.
Example: if Mrs. A is constantly complaining about her neighbour, about the prices of food, about Mr. A not helping out in the house chores and the children are not cooperative, what does this say?
What is Mrs. A telling us about herself and her attitude?
Complaining is using your energy to focus on something that you do not want; it is a reflection of your dominant way of thinking. Applying the ‘Law of Attraction’, when you have drawing attention to what you do not want, you are in fact drawing it closer to you.
Therefore, as we can see Mrs. A is attracting and focusing a lot of her thoughts and energy on things that she actually does not want in the first place. Until Mrs. A realises that, and starts to refocus her thoughts and language, and acts with more positive and constructive behavior and language, only then she will notice an improvement in her situation.
- Explain to your spouse or children that you are “redirecting” your thoughts and language. Get them to help you and remind you when you slip back to your “complaining habit”.
- Be really conscious of what you are saying: take note of the words that are coming out, and realise that they are a result of your dominant thoughts. Shift your thoughts and your language will gradually improve.