The most important job for all parents is to build loving, healthy and strong relationships with their children through connections. Young children, especially, need to secure an attachment to at least one adult, and this attachment is vital for their brain development and for thriving in life.
The more parents are attuned and connected with their children's physical and emotional needs, the more their children will cooperate. With connections, children can thrive and be happy.
How do you connect with your children? I have talked about communication, making time, listening, unconditional love… It sounds simple, right? Just play, communicate and connect with your children, how hard is that?
However, nowadays parents are experiencing more and more uncooperative behaviours from their children. It seems children are angrier, more reluctant to communicate, and avoid being in the presence of their parents…
Here are three obvious reasons why connecting with your children is challenging:
Daily challenges of work, after school commitments, financial stress, extended family commitments,… all these contribute to the inability to connect and make time for your children. By the end of the day, you are both physically and mentally exhausted, and the last thing you want to do is to play and connect with your children, right?
Most of your habits and beliefs are learned from your childhood. This was my own issue when parenting my children; I did not realise that I was parenting from my own wounds, until I came across the power of personal development and consciously moved away from the hurt and unmet needs of my childhood to become a more conscious parent.
It takes awareness and conscious steps to move away from your deep wounds and all the unmet needs, such as lack of love, attention, appreciation… from your own parents. Take the steps to heal your hurt, wounds and vows… parent from unconditional love and joy.
When you parent from a place of clarity and confidence, you will notice there will be less tension or friction between you and family members. Clarity means you will be more confident in your decision making when it comes to making the best decisions for your children and family; you will feel more calm and settled, and be able to deal with the daily stresses and challenges with ease.
As they say, whether it is your parenting or adult relationships, it all starts with YOU!
Consciously make time
By proactively making time to connect and play with your children, your children will know and feel that they are valued and loved. The reason is because to your child, TIME is s-p-e-l-t LOVE!
Children are not born armed and purposely trying to make your life difficult. Your children's behaviours are learned, just like adults; all our behaviour and beliefs are learned.
When your children FEEL they are loved, appreciated and listened to, their emotional needs are met; they will feel more connected and be more co-operative with you.
Remember, the level of co-operation from your children is related to the level of connections and love your children feels.
Have a connected day with your family.